Las Vegas Pictures!

Me and Michael Jordan! *sigh*
At the Excalibur Dinner Show


Me getting my pedicure!
Randy getting his pedicure!

Sirens of TI the Explosion

Treasure Island

Viva Las Vegas!

Oh my goodness! I am tired, but I had SO much fun!! I know you are dying to hear all about it, so sit back and get comfy this is going to be a long one!

We got to Vegas Thursday night and we had tickets to Mystere at Treasure Island. We were staying at the Tropicana, and checked in and I had mapquested the distance from the Tropicana to TI and it was under a mile that it came back at. Guess what, they were WRONG! 2.5 miles is more like it. So we booked it down the strip and got to TI with time to spare. We were on the third row in the theatre for Mystere. It was wonderful! I had no idea what to expect, and I am not sure I could even describe it. But I think Randy did it best as 'visually assaulting'. I think that nails it. It was great, and I want to see another show next time we go! After that we were off to explore and make our way back to our hotel.

The Tropicana is an older hotel, it had something in our room that I didn't know even existed in hotels. Do you see it? The ceiling had a mirror on it. And the wall behind the bed, and the wall next to it. I was SHOCKED! Seriously. I had no idea that they even put those in hotels. Classy eh?

Friday we had to go to a timeshare thingy, we got our classy hotel for free just for going to the two hour presentation. It was alright.. We went we said NO, they kicked us out and we were on our merry way.

We met some of my friends for lunch at the Rainforest Cafe. Had a great visit with them and then we were off to see more. We went and checked out the Excalibur, and then to Mandalay Bay. We went through the shark reef there. We saw lots of cool fish, sharks, sea life of all sorts and the cool crocodile, (I think.)
We got done with that and walked some more. Seriously we walked so much, my feet are tired! We ate dinner with some friends of ours, actually they came and picked us up and took us to their house. So we got to see out in Henderson area, it was nice to see other areas of Vegas besides the Strip. It was great to catch up and see the kids and see some great friends we have really missed! We are hoping to get back their and visit them again within the next year. Maybe even take the kids and stay with them for a week! That would be fun!

Then back to the Strip, we went to Paris, and went up the Eiffel Tower, it was really high up, but gorgeous! I am afraid of heights, so it was a little freaky, and then there was the distant lightning that was up there, but it was so awesome. I loved seeing all of the lights at night. It was amazing to see the view, so worth the anxiety over being up there so high. We were able to see the fountains at Bellagio and get some awesome pictures from up so high.

We watched the Sirens of Treasure Island.. It was interesting. We went through some more hotels and casinos and made it back to our hotel around 1:30 AM. It was quite the sight. So much to take in, and I was just so amazed to see all of the gambling. My very first time ever seeing a slot machines in real life. Not on TV or anything. Just totally interesting to me. Also people smoking and drinking everywhere, I am naive I have never seen it like that. I was shocked to see people lighting up in the malls and stuff. WOW!

Saturday we slept in. It was desperately needed, we were so tired!! Our feet we tired and sore so we thought we needed to do something relaxing. And have I mentioned I have THE BEST HUSBAND ever? We went and got wonderful pedicures together. Ahhh.. They were blissful! And my feet felt so much better after we were done. Then we went to a Magic Show.. Entertaining, but we saw the Tiger that had magically disappeared at the end. Good job Dirk! After that we went to check out more of the Excalibur and then we decided we had had enough of the heat and would chill by the pool for a while. It was very refreshing. After that we got ready for dinner. We went back to the Excalibur and saw the Tournament of Kings. Great dinner show, we were thoroughly entertained. It was so fun to watch and we felt so involved, I highly recommend going there! We explored a little more of the Excalibur, and my sweet honey got me a nice pair of pearl earrings! Thanks babe, you spoil me!

Then off to New York, New York. We went on the rollercoaster there. Let me tell you, it was so very very fun! We had heard mixed reviews on it, and I wasn't sure I wanted to be that high up, going that fast. Okay I did, but I knew I was going to be scared. I for some strange reason enjoy being scared beyond all reason, it is fun for me. We went on it twice, I loved it!

Finally we made it to the Venetian, GORGEOUS! I also got to get my picture taken with one of my all time favorite athletes, Michael Jordan. Basketball star of the world, right up there with my brother. Yes, I am ranking him with my brother. Pretty cool huh? I was one of the biggest Jordan/Bulls fans there was back in the day, I still like the Chicago Bulls!! Basketball.. One of my loves. Seriously I am so excited to have my picture with Jordan, even if it wax, it looks pretty darn cool!

Anyway, the Venetian was just awesome. I loved all of it. Gorgeous. Then off to see the Mirage and then Caesar's Palace. So much to see and to explore. I loved Caesar's Palace.. Well I really loved the mall there. It is open until midnight, how cool is that? I mean I wish my mall was open that late instead of a measly 9:00PM, I could go shopping so easily after the kids were in bed if that were the case. We enjoyed browsing, and finally getting through all of Caesar's Palace. It took a while. Seriously how big do these buildings need to be? You can just walk yourself to death.

We made our way back to the hotel, slowly. Dinking around and seeing all sorts of great stuff and taking it all in. And then after a good nights rest it was time to go home. We had a great time! We saw a did a lot, but feel like we only touched the top of the ice berg! Hopefully we will get to go back within the next year! It was so fun!

Blogger is having issues so I am going to have to post the rest of the pictures separately. Sorry.

I'm Leaving on a Jet Plane

I am so excited in less than 24 hours, just a little less we will be landing in Las Vegas! We are looking forward to a fun weekend. We have a few things we are planning on doing, but for the most part we are going to be flying by the seat of our pants!
I know you are going to miss me, but we are going to be having a great times sans kids. I am looking forward to missing them greatly.
I will be back Sunday night, late. So hopefully I will have pictures and some good stories!!

The rest of the pictures

The rest of the pictures, including the true colors of my little girl, see that attitude I get?
My son smacking the ball, and getting ready to field a grounder! I am so proud! How did they get so big?
Then the cute kids in the slip'n'slide, and yes her cute bum is always showing a little!

I've Been Busy

I have been busy lately, and I don't see it slowing down too much for a while. I brought it all upon myself too. My kids are busy and into everything so I figured might as well have stuff for them to keep them busy, and out of trouble. I forgot that by doing that I would make ME busier than I already am, but hey it is a lot of fun!
The kids are currently in swimming lessons everyday, with my little princess I get to go with her, notice the GET to not HAVE to, I made the choice to sign her up so it is my privlege. Little man is doing his at the same time.
Little Man is the one who is keeping me really busy. He has soccer on Mondays, and T-Ball on Tuesdays and Thursdays. We have play group and then Little Princess has Speech Therapy a couple of days in the week also. Then there is story time and park days and lots of fun things for the kids.
We had the birthday last week also, and then my big brother and his family moved back, so exciting!! So life is busy, but busy is good. I find the busier I am the happier I am. The more on my list the more fun it is.
I'm busy, I'm running all the time for here to there, and trying to keep up on the house. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I have gotten some great photo ops so here are some pictures of my cute kids for your viewing pleasure!

The rest of it

I don't want my little man to feel left out, so here is a nice picture of him! Blogger was having some issues, but I got all of my pictures up! Woo Hoo! Here are the rest of my girl today. Happy Birthday Princess, and my all of your wishes come true.

More Birthday Pictures!

Happy Birthday Princess!!

I can't believe it has been three years. It doesn't seem like it was that long ago that I held you for the first time, yet I can't imagine life without you. You are so much like me, in so many ways. The things you do crack me up, and then at times I am at my limit, and then I realize how much you are like me. I am sorry I am not the perfect Mommy, and sometimes I just need to remember you are trying, and you and me we aren't that different.

I was terrified the day you were born, you were early and I had no idea what the outcome would be. You were born at 5:38 PM on a Sunday and just 5lbs 1/2 oz and 19 1/2 inches long. Who would have thought you would grow so fast in 3 short years. You are now 29lbs and about 41 inches. You came out strong and with so much spunk! I hope you know how much I adore you, and how grateful I am to be the woman you call Mother.

My princess, my angel, my miracle, I love you.

Take a trip down memory lane and check out my little princess three years ago, and now!

First time I was able to hold her, 6 hours after my c-section. It was midnight I was so tired.

Today, her first picture as a three year old!

The Commercial Boy

Little Man loves to watch TV. Yes I know, they really don't need to watch that much, but what does 10 hours a day hurt?? HA!

He gets a little time in the AM and I think some of his favorite parts of it are the commercials. He just saw one for dish soap, and was all MOOOOOOOMMMM, get in here now! So I come a running and he was like, did you see that commercial? That dish soap turns into a vacuum and gets all the gross stuff off of the dishes. Don't you want that?

I love my Little Man, he is always looking for something new, and will tell me all about what he learns, the advertisers are marketing to a 4 year old I think. He wants all of the new cleaning products he finds!

I am just grateful he doesn't see the feminine hygiene commercials and want the info on those!!

Soccer Mom!

I think I am now a Soccer Mom, my little man is now playing soccer!! I don't have the minivan or the big SUV but I have a kid in soccer! And boy am I proud!!

I am seriously so proud of him. Tuesday was the first day of soccer. He tried so hard and did great! I feel like we are starting a new stage in life, and it is going to be a long one. I am so excited to have my kids in sports, and to see them grow and develop their skills and talents!

I am the really proud Mommy standing on the sidelines screaming Go Little Man Go! Sure that my Boy is doing better than any other little boy out there.. Or at least I hope to be. Tuesday we had some fun times tackling the ball, wrong sport there buddy but he will get it!

I have never played Soccer, so I am looking forward to learning more about it, and he is going to be getting lots of practice and I am sure he will teach me lots too.


Check out that kick? How can you not be so proud?
He had such an awesome time! He worked so hard, and is so excited to get out everyday with the soccer ball and kick it some more! Woo hoo! Go little man! I can't wait for my days and many more years of this! It brings back the memories.

I remember thinking being a Soccer Mom I would be so old, but here I am 26 and I can't think of anything better to do. Next year I will have two kids doing it, and I can't wait. My best memories from my childhood invlove sports!

Tender Mercies

I had written this out earlier today, it was much much longer, so you can thank blogger that you got the Reader's Digest Version this time!

I love Michael McLean. I love his music, it speaks to me, to my soul. I recently downloaded his CD As I Am. Let's just say I love it. The opening track is called Tender Mercies. It is wonderful, and it has really made me ponder the tender mercies in my own life.

Four years ago today my life changed. No, I didn't become a mother that day, my son was six months old. It was late and I was sitting with my family watching TV and I started coughing, not overly unusual for me, I have asthma. But I glanced at my hand and saw blood. It scared me a little, so I went to the bathroom to figure out where it was coming from. I kept coughing and more blood kept coming. So we went to the hospital. When we arrived I was put into isolation immediately and masked just in case I had Tuberculosis. I knew I didn't, I hadn't been anywhere! After lots of tests the Doctor came in and told me he was 98% sure I had Hodgeskin's Disease. As I sat there with Randy, and my little man who was just six months old I felt my world collapse, everything else the doctor said became a blur. I was taken up to a room so we could do more tests the next day.

My Dad came up that night, and together my Dad and Randy administered to me, and gave me a blessing. I was promised in that blessing that with great faith, I would have a great miracle in my life. As I sat there in bed, for the first time away from my baby, and after everyone left I was alone with my thoughts, and my fears. I sat there with the thoughts of everything that had gone on that night and just poured my heart out to the Lord. Cancer? How could it be cancer, I had just turned 22. My life was just beginning, we had just started our family, and I desperately wanted my son to have a sibling. As I sat there that night I pleaded with the Lord that I would have one more child, that I would be able to raise my children.

About 10 days after the tests I got the biopsy results back and my lymph nodes were normal. They ran another test and found out I had a pulmonary sequestration. It is a rare congenital birth defect. My radiologist was baffled because he said in a previous CAT scan that my lungs were in he didn't see the lump in my lung, so how could it be there now?

We found a cardio-thoracic surgeon who we met with and told us that it needed to be removed. I was given another blessing before my surgery and was reassured that the Lord knew what was going on in my life, and that He was in charge. The night before the surgery was a restless one for me. I was scared, and I wanted to be close to my sweet baby and I prayed it wouldnÂ’t be my last night with him. I nursed my sweet boy and prayed it wasn't the last time as I handed him to my Mom.

The next morning we went to Sacred Heart and I had my surgery, when I finally woke up I had an epidural for pain and was still in great pain. The incision they did is in my back and is said to be ten times more painful than open heart. I was laying in the Cardiac ICU and Randy was there with me, and after such intense pain I asked him for a blessing of comfort. He gave me one and when he finished I felt the pain ease, it was bearable, and I knew that the Lord was aware of me.

I ended up spending 5 days in the hospital recovering, and then another five weeks of a slow recovery. And barely over one year after it all started, we were blessed with our daughter, my little princess, my miracle.

How grateful I am for the tender mercies the Lord has given me. I would not trade this experience for anything. The Lord will not give us more than we can handle, if we lean on Him. He will ease our burdens, and comfort our hearts. I learned how much my Savior loves ME, that He is so aware of my needs, and that he is at the Helm. He suffered in Gethsemane not only for our sins, but for all that we would feel, including our physical pain. When I felt alone, I knew that He was there for me, and He knew what I was going through. How grateful I am for the gospel of Jesus Christ, for His infinite love and atonement.

The tender mercy of the Lord is all around us, sometimes it just takes opening our heart to see them. I hope all of us are able to experience them.

Something that represents me...

It is Monday!! My Life Monday nonetheless! Woo Hoo!!

Today's Topic: Something that represents me. I thought of that, because so often I am a Mom, and I feel like my kids represent me, but I had to find something, NOT someone.

So I finally decided on something that I feel represents me fairly.

This is my Piano. I love my piano. It is a very special item in my house, when we moved I even paid someone to move it, rather than risk anything happening to it.. I might of hurt someone if it had been damaged in the moved, that is how much I love it. A little info, I had a 1919 Chickering that I grew up playing, and got after I was married. It sounded awesome, BUT it looked like it was an old saloon piano, minus a few gunshots. It was pretty beat down. So in December I found this piano, a 1901 Chickering that I fell in love with. It needed to be restored so I had that done and the end of February it was completed. So it has an unbelievable sound and it is gorgeous!!

So why a piano represents me. I love music, it is part of me, and one of my passions. A lot of people are surprised to find out I have played the piano for over 22 years, much less that I am passionate about classical music. I am the farm kid who did FFA, played sports, and could do anything any boy could do. I am just as tough as anyone, so when I played a Haydn Concerto for a competition my Junior year of High School I about knocked the socks off of people. How did this crazy basketball player know how to play the piano? We thought she was just the Forward who fouled everyone.

I have enjoyed playing for hours at a time since I was little. I love the expression you get and the chance you get to bring the music alive. I love the way I can express myself, different composers help me to express different things I am feeling. When I sit down I leave the world of just a Mom, and it takes me to a place I have been able to do since I was a little girl. There is something magical about it. I love the opportunity to learn new challenging music, to push myself. It brings me so much joy.

In my living room my piano is the focal point, it is the first thing you see when you walk into my house. My Mom plays, and she taught me to love it. I want my kids to play, I want it to be part of my legacy.

Vegas Baby!

We are going to Vegas in a few weeks, just my honey and I! I was checking flight prices to do different places yesterday, I like to do that so I can dream about going somewhere. And I find such a killer deal that we decided to buy the tickets and take a long weekend in Vegas. I am so excited!!
I have never been there so I am not sure what all to do there, so please, if you have been there, live, there, or have any ideas leave them in the comments okay?
We have a few friends there that I would like to see, hopefully they can show us some cool places, also it is always fun to do stuff with a group of people right? So needless to say a kidless weekend is exciting to us.

My Life Monday- In Memory of...

I have talked about a few of my loved ones that have passed on before, my Aunt, and my Grandmother. So today I am going to talk about my Grandpas that have passed on.

First my Mom's Dad, he died two weeks after Randy and I were wed. I was sick and went to see him shortly before he passed. He was asleep and didn't wake up that day. You could sense the end was near. I got home that night after seeing him and was vomiting and running a fever, he passed away the next day, and I went to the hospital the day after with appendicitis. It was a very surreal week. I didn't really deal with my emotions, maybe it was the morphine in me, but nothing seemed real. When I got out of the hospital I was able to go get showered and go straight to his funeral.

Grandpa had been sick for a while, and had dementia so it was time for him to go. None of us could wish him to live longer. I still miss him though. My Grandpa was a great man. He served in World War II and received a Purple Heart. He married my Grandma, 13 years younger than him, and they had two girls just 11 months apart, my Mom being the youngest. Grandpa was from Arkansas, and he only had a sixth grade education, but he worked hard. He was a mechanic, and a farmer.

When I was a kid he loved to tell war stories, and you would see his eyes light up as he would tell you about them. He loved talking about driving the tanks into Germany. Grandpa always wore these green coveralls and a matching hat even in the horrible heat, he was a red head and fair and didn't want to get a sunburn.

One of my best memories is when my Grandpa was 80 he finally decided to get baptized into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. What a great blessing for all of us to be there. My cousin was baptized with him, and it was a very memorable day. He had heard about the Church for over 40 years before he finally decided to join. It was a joyous day for all of us. Shortly after baptism dementia set in and progressed quite rapidly. So after his death my brother did his work, and my Grandma and him are now sealed and they are sealed to their children putting one more link into our eternal chain.

My Grandpa love McDonalds, it was one of his absolute favorite places to go. A Quarter Pounder with cheese and an ice cream cone and he was set. It took him a long time to eat it, but it was heaven for him.

It has almost been seven years, I still miss him. I miss his smell, the twinkle in his eye, and the excitement he would get when I would play the piano. My Grandpa is pretty darn special, he was not the most talkative man, I guess being in a house with three women might do that to you, but I knew he loved me, and he is where my first name comes from.. we have a special bond.

Now my Dad's father, he passed away when I was 3 months pregnant with my little boy. He was ready, and he missed my Grandmother greatly. I am grateful that for all of my grandparents I have been able to go and visit them and say good-bye. Grandpa died on June 23, 2001 at 92 years old. He was one of the funniest old men I know. Pretty hilarious most of the time.

Grandpa was bald, he loved all of my hair and from the time I was little wanted to glue it on his head. Or so he would tell me. One time I was visiting him and he wanted to fix my hair, I let him. Then I cried. Thankfully I had my older brother there to fix it for me. He blew my hair dry, and made it HUGE, now I am talking like early 80's massive hair here, it was awful, but he had so much fun doing it. He loved my hair, and always told me I was going to be Miss America.. that is until I got taller than him. Then I was just big.. lol..

Grandpa loved ice cream too, he used to love to make ice cream cones for us. I love ice cream so I was always excited. Then one day I caught Grandpa dishing me up my cone, and he would scoop the ice cream and then lick the spoon, scoop the ice cream, lick the spoon. Ummm.. not exactly appetizing, but it was Grandpa so we just moved forward and tried to ignore it.

Grandpa was an exceptional Gardner, he always had tons of beautiful flowers. The spring before he passed away he decided to round up his front yard to kill all of the grass, he wanted more flowers. He called my Dad and told him to come fix the yard, till it and plant the glads in it. So reluctantly he did it. My Grandpa didn't live to see all of the flowers in bloom, but the 1000 glad did come up and did bloom that summer. Grandpa's flowers went to Church every Sunday, he would have been so proud! Everyone knew how much he loved his flowers!

Grandpa was a great example of a righteous priesthood holder and a great man. He raised his children strong in the Gospel, and was a hard worker. He farmed, and worked at a mill. He is still missed. I miss the quirky sense of humor, from trying to feed my dog food when I was 5 and telling me it was candy, to the stepping on the giant stink bugs.

This summer it is five years since he passed. I miss him. I remember going to visit him and telling him I was pregnant. When we were leaving the last thing he said to us was Randy, I am proud of you for finally showing your manhood. Yes my 92 year old Grandpa said that. Made me laugh. It is great to have memories, and I hope he knows how much I love him!

Weezer

I got an iPod for my birthday this past weekend. Thank you Randy!! I love it, a lot. It is one of the coolest new toys I have had in a long time. Watch out all of my other gadgets and gizmos, you have new competition.
I have rediscovered some of my favorite bands, I love iTunes, and have been downloading songs like crazy. So today I am so in love with Weezer. I love their sound. Makes me wish I could play the drums and the guitar. I have been teaching my kids how to play the air guitar, and that this is one of the best sounds. I like the Alternative sound. So many different bands. But for today Weezer makes me happy.
Beverly Hills is one of their best newer songs. Something about the drum and the beat. Just picks me up. Makes my day all better! But I still love the Undone-The Sweater Song, and basically everything from there first album Weezer.
Amazing the power music has on me. It can change my moods drastically. I am enjoying my new toy, and already have 600+ songs on it. From classical, to country, to pop, to alternative. I like it all. Right now this is fitting me, and gets me moving, helps me to be more silly.
I feel better today. Weezer helps.

Just Breathe

Breathe.. just Breathe, it will all be okay.

Today has not been my day. Actually a lot of days lately haven't been. The move has been really hard on the kids, and all of the adjusting that comes with it. It has been a little hard on me too, and I just feel like I am failing. It has been one of those days lately where I feel my kids hate me, and I am really not doing a good job at being a Mother. It sucks.

I need to just breathe, relax, I know they don't hate me, but today it sure feels like it. I feel like I am failing.. I have so little patience, and I really should be doing better. They are precious children from our Heavenly Father, who for some reason actually trusted me with these angels. Why, I am not so sure right now? I think I am screwing them up more than I am helping them.

I am not sure what I need to do.. I pray, I read my scriptures, and still I feel like I am fighting a losing battle. Does it get easier? When they are no longer little do they start listening. My sweet little boy when I put him in time out told me, you are mean and not my Mommy. My Mommy is nice, and you aren't. It crushed me. I know he is just a little boy, but it seems like everything I do ends in failure.

It will pass right? I sure hope so. I love them, but they are wearing me down.. so for now, I'm just going to breathe..

My Life Monday-My Name

Week 3 - My parents named me __________ because . . .

When I was born my parents still weren't sure what to name me when I was born. They had been thinking of Kay Lousie, I am personally glad they didn't go with that choice. Then about Durenda Louise. Another one I am grateful they didn't name me, not that I don't like the names, but they just aren't me, if you get what I m saying.
Finally my Grandpa who was named Lee, said why don't you just name her Lee Ann and get it over with. So they did.
My parents did it as two words, spelled the totally normal way, not added letters or anything and you would think people could get it right. They don't. I am either LeAnne, LeeAnne, LeAnn, LeighAne, and the list goes on. Or I am Mr. Lee ...... Yes I get called Mr. A lot by people who don not know me.
When I turned 18 I got letters saying I needed to sign up for the draft. Umm hello, yes I know my first name is Lee, but I am a girl, come and get me if you want, I am not signing up. It totally cracks me up. For those of you wondering what I go by, it depends on who is talking to me. I tend to answer to both. I am told my Dad would have never put a space between it if he had known people would call me Lee, but personally I like it. I loved my Grandpa and I am honored to share the best first name in the world with him.

Cursing my Camera, or maybe Best Buy..

I bought my Canon Digital Camera about 18 months ago. A month ago it quit recognizing memory cards. I bought the extended warranty from Best Buy. So I took it there, and they were like oh it shows your warranty was cancelled. WHAT?? Why would I cancel it? They were all did you return it? Umm, NO, it is here in my hand you moron. I was just slightly irritated. I swear I have the worst experiences there, not sure if I will EVER buy anything there again. Sorry I am digressing from my original point of this post. So finally they get it figured out, and they had a glich, I do have the warranty, after two weeks of fighting them over this and calling corporate. So supposedly it is being fixed..
I am just slightly inpatient, and irritated. Maybe that is an understatement.
Sadly and at the fault of them I am missing all of these great photo ops. Oh how I miss having my camera.
We moved, I missed getting all the pictures of moving in. We have decorated and painted and I want pictures of it all.
My kids are doing super cute stuff, and I can't get pictures of it!! AUGHH!!! It is driving me crazy.
Today for instance, my kids have been astronauts, going to outer space. Guess what they are wearing for Space Helmets? Costco milk boxes. They are using their imaginations so much and just having fun. Didn't know there could be such a creative use for those did ya? They look freaking cute!!
So hopefully my camera will be coming home soon.. I miss it... I need it. I am not a great photographer, but I enjoy capturing the memories.

Mother's Day

Mother's Day. A great day to celebrate our Mother's and also being a Mother. First I need to share about my own Mom, she is really great!

I have the best Mom in the world. I hope I can be the type of Mom to my kids that she was to me. She is a great example of a righteous woman. I can't express how grateful I am for such a wonderful loving Mother who has sacrificed so much for me. I hope that she knows she is the best Mom in the world.

I also have the best husband and kids in the world. Last night Randy took me out on a date. It was wonderful! We got pedicures together. His first one. (Sorry dear to announce that to everyone, but your feet are all nice looking now!! Woot!!) Then we went to dinner had a fantastic time, then off to get my present from him. He knew what he wanted to get me, but wanted to let me choose it to make sure I got what I wanted. So we went to Target and he got me a awesome new clock. It is a huge mahogany framed square clock. It looks terrific in my living room. (I am posting pictures once I get my freaking camera back!!) I am totally thrilled with it.

This morning my kids gave me my present from them. They got me scrapbook stuff. Two leather 12X12 albums, and refill 12X12 paper. I am excited yet totally freaked out on what to do. I do occasional digital scrapbooking and I need ideas on how to do 12X12. So if you have ideas, or links leave them in the comment section please. I am feeling a little inept. I am excited to get it going but now sure if you have to do it differently that the standard 8 1/2 X 11. So since I am handicapped in this department, help!!

My Mother's Day Freaking ROCKED!! To all the other Mom's out there Happy Mother's Day!

Two for Togetherness Tag

Alicia tagged me, so I have something to blog about!

Two for Togetherness Tag

2 Things you compliment your husband on while in his presence.
1. His good looks.
2. His kindness.

2 Compliments you make to your friends about spouse.
1. He helps me out all of the time.
2. He is a hardworker.

2 Traits you married him for.
1. His fun attitude and ability to make me laugh.
2. His kindness to me, and absolute love he had for me.

2 Days you cherished the most with your husband being together.
1. Our wedding day.
2. When the munchkins were born.

2 Material things you would give to your husband if you just inherited a forture.
1. A shot gun, and lots of property to hunt on and fish on.
2. A canary yellow Corvette.

2 Things you would miss the most if he left for two weeks.
(Been there done that)
1. Him.. everything about him from his smell, his touch, his mess. Everything.
2. The companionship.

2 Thoughts that crossed your mind when you first met/saw your spouse.
1. I want to meet him, because he is so cute!!
2. Hopefully he will notice me.

2 Favorite Dates.
1. Our first official date after a week of making out. Olive Garden, Ice skating, and making out!
2. The night we got engaged.

2 Funny odd things that you love.
1. Hmm.. odd?? The way he drives me nuts sometimes.. I would miss it!!
2. Nothing really seems odd, he is just him.

2 Places you have lived with your spouse.
1. In our Condo.
2. In our Home.

2 Favorite Vacations.
1. Disneyland.
2. Honeymoon.

Shelah, Lisa, Misty, and Jane you are tagged!! Can't wait to hear your answers!!

Six Weird Things You May Not Know About Me

I was tagged by Emily so you get to learn six weird things about me.

1. My hands are bigger than my husbands, I can palm a men's regulation basketball no problem. They were bigger than most of the guys I went to High School with.

2. I had 7 surgeries in the first five years Randy and I were married. It has been two years since the last one!! WOOT!!

3. I helped neuter one of our cats when I was in high school, it was pretty cool. I would totally be a vet if I didn't have to go to school for so long, and the whole I am a Mom thing.

4. I was a lab tech pre-kids. I could even draw my own blood.

5. I count everything, always. I have done it for years and I try to make things add up to the age I am, divide, multipy, subtract, anyway I can do it.

6. I like pickles, a lot. Once when I was a kid my brother asked me if I was pregnant because I ate so many. I got all confused because I knew where babies came from, anyways I thought I did.. So I was all freaked out. They are really good with some Parmesan cheese on them.

I think most people I really know have been tagged, so if you read this, you are tagged, that is unless you already did it, I understand.

Blogger Slacker

Me, I am a total slacker. I promise I have great reasons.
1. We moved, and I am trying to get totally settled, and make this house my home, hopefully longer than two years!!
2. I haven't been online a lot and find it easier to spend less time on.
3. My kids, they go crazy if I am on the computer and they are awake, and my friend Alicia keeps telling me I need to go to bed earlier so I will feel better, so my blog and everything are being neglected. Sorry, if you are glad thank her, and if you are sad, blame her.

Since we have moved I have hung curtains, and have more to hang. Guess what I did yesterday and today? I painted my kitchen a nice red color!! I absolutely love it. I also have these great curtains that I got a Target that I am going to hang in there, I think it will look fab!! So it has kept me busy. I know Randy loves that I keep going to Sherwin Williams and coming home with more paint. He is a good sport about it!!

I promise to share some pictures once I get my camera back. It broke, so I sent in to get fixed.. *sigh* I really miss it.

My kids have been totally crazy, but they are really trying. And I am trying harder to be more patient and kind with them. Little man wants to help do everything, I just need to slow down and let him, what a difference it makes. And the Princess, well she just wants to do everything her brother does. They are good helpers, just slower than me, but that will change in time lol. They have been through a lot of change the past six weeks, I think they are finally starting to feel like they are getting their feet on the ground.

Did I mention we moved into the BEST ward ever!! I seriously love it! I have met some really great ladies who are just awesome. We did a break the fast potluck at our house Sunday after Church with our new friends and it was awesome. We have playgroup and it is great. I am so happy to be in a great ward, and I already have a calling, CTR 8. I taught on Sunday, and even though I was a little apprehensive it went well, and I actually think I am really going to like it.

Life is slowly getting back to normal. And I promise, I will try to not be such a slacker.. I still need to do my tag from my friend Emily, hopefully I can get to it this week.. I promise I am not ignoring you!!

BACK!!

After a chaotic week of moving unpacking, and trying to get settled we have internet and our back!

What a busy busy week we have had. We signed, last Thursday and recorded and funded all in the morning, totally fast!! So we started moving last Thursday afternoon after I painted one wall in my little man's room green, and my laundry room a nice blue faux finish. We got enough moved on Thursday night we were able to sleep here!

Friday brought lots more moving and a ton of unpacking. Saturday was more of the same and finally just a little bit of relaxing. Then Sunday Church brought a welcome break!! A nice relaxing Sabbath day.

Monday we got the dog run up, and even were able to take the kids bowling, and then Tuesday we spent the day building the kids the Swing Set. Little Man said while we were working today is only a work day right? No fun or play for us, just lots of work. Made me totally laugh!

Yesterday we finally were back and into the swing of things. I have hung some pictures and I am thinking of painting my kitchen. We are keeping really busy, but I think we are finally starting to feel settled!! WOO HOO!!

I totally love our new home. It feels like we are right at home. I will post pictures after we get my camera back.. It is broken, hopefully it will be fixed soon!

Moving.. Again

We closed on our house today, I have been busy painting and getting stuff ready. We are moving today and tomorrow.. hopefully we will get it all done quickly. I don't know that I will post again until we are settled!! WOO HOO!!!

Goodbye to a Great Woman

My Aunt Marge passed away today, she lost a long battle to cancer. She is truly a great woman, and she will be missed by all.
Her newest Grandson, Harrison was born on Thursday, and she got to meet him today, and then died shortly there after. Amazing how thin the veil is. I truly believe she was just holding on to meet her new grandson.
My Aunt Marge had little feet, she wore a size 5 shoe, that is what I wore in first grade, and she would let me play in her shoes when I was little, it made me feel very important and special.
She is a great example of a righteous woman. She always made me laugh to, had a great sense of humor. It is sad to see her go, but we are all grateful she doesn't have to suffer anymore.
Aunt Marge, I love you!

Swinging!

We are swingers! Well, my kids and I are, Randy, not so much. He really isn't into it, I think it is because he gets sick. Everytime he swings for very long he gets motion sick. Poor guy huh?

I have loved to swing since I was little, and I still love it. My kids have the same passion for it as I do. It brings back fun memories and makes me feel like I am a kid again. I love things like that. Little Miss is so obsessed, she goes out and yells, HIGH, HIGH! Over and over. She is all laughs. My Little Man who can pump, hooray!! Keeps telling me he is the fastest and the highest! The major perk, is the kids are wearing themselves out!! WOO HOO!!!

It is fun for me to see my kids enjoying stuff that I loved so much. It is amazing how strong some of the similarities are. My kids love the outdoors, and would spend all day there if they could. Darn Mom makes them come in to use the bathroom, and try to keep them somewhat civil.

It is fun to watch them and see a piece of me, to remember what it was like to be a kid, when dandylions were the coolest flower, not an obnoxious weed. Swinging, ahh the memories.

Stitches.

My little man had to get stitches last night. He was climbing up onto a chair and his finger got pinched badly. He cut his left ring finger open on the tip exposing all of the flesh. He is a bleeder!!
We took him to the urgent care and the put 3 stitches in his finger. I am very proud of him, he sat there bravely and was a big boy. The doctor said he was one of the best. He got a shot to numb it and was so calm, and good. He watched the doctor stitch it up, and he didn't flinch at all. Amazing coming from a four year old.
We took him for Ice Cream, and to get some cool band-aids. He is quite proud of his wound and has been telling everyone it is good as new! Hopefully we can avoid the urgent care for a while.. but if things really do come in three's then we have one more.

House Pictures!

My House

Living Room the Office is across the hall with double doors, I didn't get a picture of it.

Kitchen, and Pantry

Kitchen

Dining Room

Bathroom Next time stairs and family room

Family Room Main Floor, we plan in time to build a mantle around it, by we I mean Randy. It took two posts to get all of my pictures in, sorry. So this is kind of a tour of it. We are so excited to move in!!

Pictures of the House!!

Stairs


Looking Down the Stairs


Family Room Upstairs

One of the bedrooms

Another shot of the room, the only one painted

Kid Bathroom

Our Bathroom

Checkout the tub!! I can lay down in it, and that is saying something since I am 6'!!

HAPPY NEWS!!

I promised I would update, and today we found out we didn't get the house I wanted. We found out Monday night that it didn't look like we were going to, so I started a mad hunt for something else. Tuesday I drove by a nice light yellow house, thought it was cute, called my realtor and said I want to see it. We went through it that day, and it was awesome!
Wednesday we went through it again, and then made an offer on it. We offered a little low, and I was praying they would take it, and guess what?? They did!! Hooray!!!! So in 3-4 weeks.. maybe even less we get to move into our own house again. I love my parents dearly, but I seriously cannot wait to be in our own home again.
Now all of the details. It is almost 3100 sq ft. 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, with an office also. I wasn't going to do a two-story, again, but we did. It has all bedrooms upstairs, the family room up and the laundry room. I love the master it is huge and it has a 6' jetted tub in it, so it will be great for a nice soak!!!
Downstairs has the kitchen, dining room, living room, office, and another family room. It has tons of tile, (I have never had that before). I will post pictures when I get some. I am so excited to paint and to decorate.
It doesn't have as big of a yard as I was wanting, but it is still really nice, and all we really want to take care of!! So today has been a great day!!!

The Last One

This is my last Time Out For Women post.. (I think.) Dean Hughes author of the Children of the Promise series, and All Moms Go to Heaven talked on Motherhood. Kind of ironic for a guy huh? It was wonderful!
He talked about how hard it was to be a SAHM, he was a SAHD one summer.. and told some great stories, I suggest reading his book also. One thing he said, and I rang true to me is that we as women are in danger of comparing ourself to other Moms. Seeing everyone's good qualities and only your bad ones. How true is that? He talked about what a great work this is, and that the job is worth the work.
I wish I could express everything that I felt on Saturday, it was truly a wonderful feeling. Michael McLean and Cherie Call did a great job with the music. Music really speaks to me, and to my heart. It was such a spiritual experience and something I do not want to forget.
I am so grateful for the opportunity I had to feel the love of my Heavenly Father so strongly. If you are anywhere close to where they are doing a Time Out For Women, go!! It is well worth it.
For me I find that so often at Church my kids are crazy and I don't really get to "fill" my bucket. Right now it seems that it is overflowing. It has rejuvenated me, helped me to feel like I can go on, and that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing.
How grateful I am for this great gospel, what a blessing in my life. I don't know how I could do it without it.

Feeling God's Love

Viriginia Hinckley Pearce was another phenomenal speaker. She talked about Feeling God's Love. I don't think I had ever really thought about this. What a great topic it was, and she had such a wealth of information and it was just wonderful. Okay, they all were wonderful!
Every Human Being is of Great Worth. Our Heavenly Father doesn't care if you are Bill Gates, or Me, we are worth the same to Him. I don't think I had ever really thought about that.
I have struggled with my self-worth, and feeling like I am okay. Loving myself enough, I always feel like I am not doing good enough, and I could be kinder, nicer, skinnier, prettier, blah, blah, blah. She said we need to have a testimony of our own worth, it is very important, as important as our testimony of Joseph Smith. We need to say it outloud so that we can hear it, have the Holy Ghost witness it and know it is true. What an interesting concept for me. Can I really do that? I have never thought of the importance of really KNOWING your worth. I know in Young Women's we have our value, the red one Individual Worth, I was always like yeah, yeah, whatever I don't want to be self-centered, and arrogant. The other thing that struck me along with this was that we need to quit telling ourselves the bad stories about us, and quit believing them. Who cares what people have said about you in the past?? Easier said than done huh?
I am working on that, working on it hard. For years I have had people tell me I am fat, not as much anymore except the one brother that I see on occasion. He always has to make sure and tell me I look huge. It hurts, but I need to realize oh well.. that is his issue, not mine.
As we feel God's love we will know of our great worth. There is no shortage of God's love in the universe, only our inability to feel it. I got Sister Pearce's book and it is just wonderful. I am really striving to find ways to feel God's love more, and to open my heart to others. If you want a motivational good read I highly recommend it!!

Broken Dreams

Sharon G. Larsen gave an excellent talk, it was Our Dreams May Be Broken, But I'm Not.
She started by saying, for most of us life hasn't turned out the way we dreamed it would when we were fourteen. I have tried and tried to remember dreams I had from 14, where I wanted to be.
I knew I wasn't going to have kids before 30, and hopefully wouldn't be married much before then. I either wanted to be a vet, nurse, or a model.
How different my life is. I got married shortly after my 19th birthday, and had my first child at 21. My life isn't at all what I thought it would be. But I am not sad about that. Amazing what the Lord does.
Sister Larsen said some great motivational things. She said, "When we think we are entitled and life isn't fair, Satan is able to get a hold of us." I know there have been many times life hasn't really seemed fair. I think we all deal with times like that.
I wish I could explain this more eloquently, but these are just my memories and thoughts from it. She talked about how we need to quit being the victim. Happiness and Joy our own. We will all have people in our lives who have wronged us, but we cannot dwell on those facts, we need to allow the Lord to heal our broken hearts. We need to let go of the stuff that people have said to us/about us/or the times we have been wronged. We can't borrow strength from others. We draw it from ourself, and from God. How true that is. He is there to sustain us and to help us.
We have to move forward from the past, move past our broken dreams, and embrace what we have. Be happy with who we are and what we are doing. She has a great book, it explains it better than I can, but I left there with a great appreciation for her.
What were your dreams when you were 14?

Free Agency

I am still on the Spiritual High from TOFW. I want all of my thoughts written down so I can remember them. So I figure my blog is the best spot.
Joseph Fielding McConkie gave a terrific talk on The Power God has Given Us. Our Free Agency. I learned a lot from it. Stuff I guess I hadn't really understood as well as I thought I had.
He said, "We have the capacity to do wrong, we do not have the God given right to do wrong. Agency is the right to do what is right."
What a powerful statement that is. It really impressed me.
I walked away with a better understanding of Free Agency, it helped that he used a NBA anaylsis. He explained that when a player signs a contract to play for a team, say the Utah Jazz, they are under contract, they can't get mad and go make a basket for the other team just because the coach did something dumb. It is the same when we make covenants with the Lord. Our covenants are our contract. We can't go make a basket for the other team, we signed a contract. For me, it made more sense, it was an ah-ha moment.
I love learning gospel stuff that I have heard my whole life, but suddenly it clicks and makes more sense, and it just works.

You're Not Alone

Today was a great day for me. I went to Time Out For Women, and was able to really enjoy the Spirit I felt, and the peace. This week I am going to share little stuff I learned. If I wrote it all now, it would take forever.
I really like Michael McLean. He has a great song, You're Not Alone, and I have heard it many times before, but today it hit me, and I really heard it. I have been struggling with my lupus for a few months now, and I have good and bad times, but it is a constant roller coaster. I hate to whine complain or tell anyone how I feel, I don't want to be a downer.
So often I feel like no one knows how I am feeling. I have friends who have it, but it affects each person differently. Today I realized that I am not alone on my journey. I have someone who does truly understand and will ease my burdens. My older brother, and Savior Jesus Christ. How grateful I am to Him. I know He will ease the burdens if I allow Him to. He will never leave us. How grateful I am for this gentle reminder. Those days when I feel all alone I know that He truly knows how I am feeling. This realization today has brought me so much joy.
How grateful I am for a loving Heavenly Father who helps us to hear messages we need.

OOPS!!

We had a major laundry mishap today. We needed some clean clothes so I was on a mission to get it all done today. That didn't happen. I got a few loads done, and then when I was getting ready to switch my darks, I noticed that the bottle of ALL has fallen over and leaked a little, not sure how it leaked, but it did. I didn't think it was a big deal, I mean ALL is just detergent right?
I finished folding and then opened the washer and looked in horror as I saw bleach spots all over my new jeans, so quickly I close it. You know maybe it really isn't what I thought, right? I open it again, and nope it is still there. So I freak and ask who put bleach in with my darks. I tell my Mom the ALL detergent had spilled and maybe it even leaked into the washer, and then she tells me, nope that is ALL BLEACH! Yep, bleach. I had no idea that ALL even made a bleach, but they do, and let me tell you it works very well.
It literally ate through my jeans, and a nice dress shirt of Randy's. And it bleached spots on several other items.
This is a time I am thankful that I can laugh, and know that it is okay. One of my first thoughts was ohh.. I need pictures, I want to blog about this!!
Good thing I like shopping huh? I have lots more pictures of everything that got ruined, my sweet Mom keeps telling me she wants to pay for it, I don't expect that. It is not like she poured it all over my clothes.. or did she?
It could have been worse, and after all it is just clothing, nothing that important. Wouldn't it be easier if we could just get disposable clothes, no more laundry, or mishaps with the laundry!!

The House I Want

I have been sitting here trying to think of something interesting to blog about. But the only thing on my mind is this blasted house that I want, and might possibly get.
The odds are going up slowly each day. The first people lined up to buy the house are supposed to close next Friday, the 14th, and they still don't have all of their ducks in a row. I am thrilled about this. Nice huh? It gives me hope. I need hope for this right now. I can't find another house that I like nearly as much as this one.
Want to hear all about it? It is 2808 square feet all on one floor. For me, that is wonderful!! It is exactly what I want. It has four large bedrooms, and 2 1/2 baths. It has everything I want, it isn't elaborate or anything fancy, just the right floor plan and flow for what I like. I really really want a one story so I can be done with stairs. Somedays they are just too hard. So it works great. It has a huge kitchen with a nice breakfast nook. Nice size family room that is a great place for the kids. It has really ugly berber in their though lol. I love the formal living area, I can totally see my piano there, and the formal dining room is huge. We won't use it for a long time for eating, maybe for a pool table?? The bedrooms are all really big. The master has hideous wallpaper and that will have to go, but that is doable. The kids rooms are great sized, one is already blue!! Just have to paint my little princess' room pink and it will be good to go!!
Best of all it is located on a half acre, so we will have a huge yard, and it has a great pool. I have had mixed feelings on the pool, but after prayer and deliberation we have decided it is okay. It will have a six foot locked fence around it and security cover so my kiddos are safe!!
Sounds great huh? See why I am in love? People who have seen my others homes are a little suprised I am so in love with this one. In fact my brother and his wife were sure I wouldn't really want to live there. The last two houses I have lived in have been brand spankin' new. If this was new, well I couldn't even touch it, it would be too freaking $$. But it isn't, it was built in 1973. And you can tell. It doesn't have green and orange shag carpet, but it does have the old dark dark wood, and the popcorn ceilings. It needs to be cosmetically updated and modernized a little. I am so excited to do it all. I have the vision of what it will be when we are done, and it is freaking gorgeous!! So I have to be patient and realize it will take time and money to get it done, but when it is done, I will love it. I have all sorts of stuff planned for what I want to do. But I am being realistic, realizing that it will probably take five years or so. Unless we come into a ton of money.
I am emotionally vested in this house, I want it. I see us there, and not moving again for a LONG time. I want a house that my kids will bring their friends to. It has the seperation I want, and the yard I want. I see us raising our kids their in this nice quiet neighborhood where it seems everything is a slower pace of life. So I am praying we get it. Nothing compares to it, not even the new ones. This one just flows right, it fits us so well.
We will know soon.. but not soon enough, I wanted to know yesterday!!!
P.S. Sorry there are no pictures, but if we get it I will post all of them!!

OW!

My little princess is proving to be more and more like me. I am told by most people she looks like me, just with a lighter complexion. She has curls like me and is tall like me. She also has been blessed to inherit my grace, or the lack there of. She is a klutz like me and tends to get hurt a lot.
Now just since moving between the two of us we have gotten hurt a lot. Today for example, she had to go to the urgent care today after running into a door jam and gashing her chin open. It split pretty good. Thankfully it wasn't that deep and we ended up with just steri-strips. She also banged her knee good.
Today I was leaving Costco with my Dad, it was raining, I was wearing flip flops. (Haven't found my other shoes yet, haven't looked either.) My Dad took off so I was running to catch him, I had just walked out of Costco. Did you know that wet concrete is very, very slippery? It is, I totally fell, almost doing the splits, but I landed really hard on my right knee. It hurt. A lot. I got up and caught back up with my Dad to be informed that he had beat me. Gee Dad, not hard when I am lying on the concrete. But whatever. So now I am limping a little. This is just one of the ordeals my little princess and I have had.
After 25 years of this I have learned to laugh, and hope she will do the same. I see a little piece of me in her everyday. It totally cracks me up, and so far she seems to handle it quite well. It makes it a little easier to be able to laugh about it. But man, sometimes it leaves you hurting pretty good. We need to invest in some good protective wear! We would be much safer.

Moved

We are moved, and currently living with my parents. I am grateful for their kind hospitality. Life is hectic, so I am not sure how often I will get a chance to actually post anything.
I am looking for a house like crazy. We put an offer on one, BUT we are the first backup, sadly. Hopefully the first offer falls through, then mine will be accepted and by the end of April life will be returning back to normal. I will keep that updated. So if you have any extra prayers, pray we get the house, and not the other people. Nice huh? I will update when I learn anything on that.
Moving is not fun, I am not looking forward to doing it again. Next time I think I sell the house furnished.

Moving!!

We are moving tomorrow! It has been a little crazy and chaotic. I thought I would just be totally excited, but I am a little sad. I am full of emotions. We are moving back by our family and that is so exciting for us, and for our kids. I love where we are moving the area is great!
I didn't expect to be sad. I am really going to miss our neighbors. We have the most fantastic neighborhood and great friends here. They are people I plan to keep in touch with for a long time. They are the type of friends that are just real, no pretenses about them. You can be you and they like you for you, it is totally real. I like that.
My little man had his last day of preschool today, and my princess had her last speech therapy here. I was doing everything and realizing that tomorrow we move. Tonight is our last night here. I really love my house, it is a great house, that I will miss.
I owe Randy a sincere apology. I am a little bit... Okay a lot ornery when we are moving. I think the stress and everything gets to me and I am pretty short at times. I am sorry. I am really trying to work on being better this time.
All in all, I am very excited to be moving. I am excited for the change, and to find the "perfect house" for us. I am sure we will be able to find the right place and have everything work out. I am excited to be back by my old friends and all of our family. I love where we are going!
Since the computer is going to be packed it might be a little bit before I write again!! Ciao!

Random Acts of Kindness.. Even the little things matter

You never know how your actions will affect people. Little things, comments, all of it you never know. And often it really does affect people, helps them when they need it. It could be the little bit of encouragement, the simple kindness of just a hug, sometimes the smallest things make the biggest difference.
I received a card in the mail yesterday, and I was totally shocked. A lady I met last August in ShopKo sent me a card. You see, I talk to anyone and everyone, and I have never met a stranger. I tend to be able to talk to anyone about anything. I like to talk, it is fun for me.
Anyways, somehow in the checkout line we were talking and she told me she was moving to where I lived. We were in a totally different city at the time, so a total coincidence. Anyway, we were talking about housing, neighborhoods and schools and we ended up exchanging addresses, and phone numbers. Yes, I give out that personal of info to strangers, safe huh?
I didn't really think much of it as I left that day. And I had not thought of it again since, it was seven months ago. I was shocked to get a card in the mail from her. She thanked me for my kindness and telling her the good neighborhoods. She said when I talked to her it made her feel a little bit of excitement that she was moving. It totally surprised me something I thought was so insignificant meant so much to her.
It goes to show that you never know who is watching you. Who is touched by what you do. You never know who needs the little extra encouragement. The little things we do matter, no matter how little they are someone notices. I challenge everyone to step outside of the normal, say Hi to the little old lady at the grocery store, it might just make her day. It is the little things that count.

Tired and Stressed, go ahead and skip!

I am tired. And thinking about next week makes me even more tired. Maybe I will go back to bed and get up next Saturday, that might be a good idea.
This week has been a draining week for me, mentally and physically. I learned that my lupus reacts very strongly to stress, not just a little bit. I hurt this morning, a lot.. my meds did crap for me this week.
I am so excited I sold my house, but then I have this stress of where are we going to live? We will be with my parents until that is figured out for sure. Thankfully they have a big house and are easy to live with.
So I have been stressed out for like a week, I am trying so hard not to be. I have also learned when I am stressed, I quit eating. So I am getting skinnier!! Hooray for that right?
The house I really want has an offer on it, so we put a back up offer on it, and they said 30% chance we will get it.. not very good odds, but I hope it is in my favor. So I am anxiously waiting for that. I am trying to get all the mortgage stuff in order in case it does work out.
I am to the point I just feel blah.. I swear everyday I have more to do, and less energy. We need to be packed by next Friday so we can move.. the thought exhausts me.
I am ready to be done.

Indecisive

I am indecisive. I swear I cannot make a decision and stick with it for the life of me. I will ask everyone I know what I should do, and do my best to take their advice and still be totally confused.
My poor husband I call him tell him everything I am thinking and then say, "I don't know?" Doesn't matter what it is, from what to eat, to what house to buy. Making a decision and sticking to it is hard for me.
There are so many options I want to make sure I explore all of them, I mean I have to be equally fair to all my options right?
It is especially hard for me when I have two good choices in front of me. Like do I get a Blueberry Truffle, or an Apple Pie Truffle? I mean really, what is so hard about that? Then comes the thinking of what do I really want more?
Thankfully my little man has more of his Dad in him than me. You ask where he wants to go eat, and give him a list, and then I can even give him more after he decides, just making sure he has all the options available and he still sticks to his choice. Maybe it is a guy thing? I don't know.
Hopefully I can get better at this. But if not, be prepared to help me make all my many important (ha!) decisions.

WOO HOO!!

Guess what?? We sold our house yesterday!!!!! WOO HOO!! We have to be out by the 20th of April, but are thinking we might get out of here sooner. We are going to stay with my parents until we find the right house. I am so excited!!

Done

When the clock strikes midnight I will be done. My life will return to normal. I cannot wait. Randy gets home tonight after seven long weeks of training.
I am so ready to be in his arms again. I am done playing the single Mommy. I am done being alone. I miss his touch, and his smell.
My sweet little boy comes in at night and gets in our bed and says Mommy I will sleep with you, I know you don't like to sleep alone, you always make Daddy sleep with you. It totally cracks me up. He is right, I miss him being next to me at night, the extra security that it provides.
Randy, you are my rock. I have missed you more than you will ever know. Thank you for making such a sacrifice and going through this so we will be able to have much more time as a family from here on. I love you.

Happy Birthday to Sage!!

Sage my dog, she is one today. So Happy Birthday to her!! We got her last May when she was nine weeks old. She has become an important member of our family. I have posted before about how much I love my dogs. Sage brought it out a part of me that I think I had lost.
As a kid I loved my animals. All animals actually, even worms. I used to want to play with all of them, and not let any of them feel left out. I used to put the worms down the hot metal slide, thinking I was being nice, when I was causing them to die a slow and painful death.
We had a cat who had kittens, I wouldn't play with one, I had to carry all six at once so the others wouldn't be left out. It is much who I still am today. I never want anyone to feel like they aren't important to me, so I try to include them how ever I may.
As a kid I seriously believed when I was at Church my animals were at the animal Church, I wanted them to be righteous too. I talked to them, I loved them, they were my friends.
I think I forgot how much I enjoyed them until we got Sage. She has been my buddy. She is the sweetest girl and has brought a part of my childhood back to me. I see the same light in my kids eyes. They have that love and passion for animals. My son even asked me if they went to Church!
So Sage's birthday is important. She has become a part of our family! We took her to Utah with us when she was 10 weeks old, she was the best traveler!! She has been a terrific companion for our family. I put her in obedience classes and took her through advanced. She has become a very well mannered girl also.
One thing about labs, is they are puppies for two years, so I am grateful we have the first year down and I still love her lots!
So Happy Birthday Girl!!

Four Years

Four years ago today my friend Jared committed suicide. I still remember his cousin coming over to tell me. It didn't seem real, I felt like I was in a horrible dream. I couldn't believe at just 22, his life was over.
As a new mother, I held my 3 month old son and wept for how his sweet mother Janice must be feeling. I couldn't even begin to imagine the pain that had to be in her heart. Janice and I have stayed very close since this. I want her to always know how much she and her husband are loved. And also how much we all still love Jared.
Jared was a good friend through High School. I moved my sophomore year to a new school and he was one of my first friends, and ended up being one of my best friends. It is hard to imagine that the class president from my Senior class won't be there. We were a tight group, just 33 of us, so his presence will and is greatly missed.
It hit me today that it had been four years, it is hard to believe it has been that long. I called Janice and we talked about him, and she told me that a few of his friends were really in a dark place at the time, and after seeing what his death caused, all of the sorrow, they got the help they needed. She is so grateful that his death could help save others.
Part of the reason I posted this is for people to realize it happens. I have not dealt with depression in my life, and had not been exposed to it. But this has brought a great awareness for me. It is a very real thing, that many people suffer with in silence.
To anyone who reads this, if you are struggling with depression or having suicidal thoughts, please get help. If you know someone who is struggling, please reach out to them. You may save their life. You never know the impact your kindness and friendship will have on someone. We all go through struggles in our life, many are not seen, but you are loved. Never forget how much our Heavenly Father loves you, you are a Child of God. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and reach out to those around you. Let those who love and care about you help you.

Best Marriage Advice Ever!

You know when you get married everyone wants to give you advice. The don't go to bed angry. Always go to bed together. Be a good wife and get up and make your husband breakfast. The whole list of the standard things you are told.
We received some advice from someone, and for the life of me I cannot remember who it is, dangit! The advice was if you get in a fight, and chances are you will, Fight Naked! I remember thinking yeah right, like that will do me any good, I will be too embarrassed to do anything and hide. But it I believe is the best advice ever.
For us Women we strip and everything we were talking about with our husbands, well it goes right out the window. Their eyes glaze over and all they think it, my wife is naked, my wife is naked. You win, no question about it. And really you can't stay that upset if you are stripping your clothes off while in an argument, anyways I know I can't.
This works terrific for the newlyweds, it is more difficult to do though once the children are born. But it will work if you get into your room and just lock the door.
Another blessing of this, is it does encourage you to make up sooner! So to everyone out there not sure what to do in a fight with your honey, I challenge you to fight naked next time, see what happens!

Monday Madness

Sadly I dropped my husband off at the airport last night, but I was also a little excited. It was the last time I will have to do that. I am anxious for this week to fly by!
Monday's are a little bit of an off day for us right now. The kids miss Daddy, they are confused why Mommy would just drop him off and leave him there. And we are trying to get back into the synch of things. My sweet man woke promptly at 6AM, way too early!! I convinced him to snuggle with me for a hour before getting up and doing all the Mommy duties of the day.
After a sluggish morning getting the kids their Eggo's and me downing my Special K we finally got a little motivation. I am currently doing the Special K Diet. Today is the first day of my second week. I don't own a scale but I do feel thinner, so we'll see what I think at the end of it. I managed to get my kids and I to the gym! Hooray!! I got five days in last week, and hope to do the same this week. I got in a good 90 minute workout. It is amazing how much better I feel after that.
The kids are still a little tired, and ornery. It is understandable though, it is hard having Dad gone so much lately. Maybe we can do some extra fun activities this week. I am hoping to either go see Grandma and Grandpa for a day and the feed the ducks, or find something really fun to do here. (Not sure if that is possible.)
Anyways.. Monday's are a little crazy here, but nothing we can't handle. Just smile and take it with stride right? It will be Friday before you know it!

Another Week Down

Six weeks ago when Randy started his training I thought how am I going to do this alone? How will I make it through seven weeks of him being gone, home for about 40 hours on the weekends. How will I stay sane? How do I go that long without the love of my life? How do I keep the house clean, and try to get it sold? How do I find the next one? Can I really handle all of this? Why me, why now?
Amazingly I am doing it. I am managing to keep the house clean, the kids dressed and clean, and get it all done. I have a new found confidence in my skills as a Mother and as a housekeeper and wife. I feel like I am able to do it all, and be okay.
I prayed and prayed that I wouldn't have to do this alone again, (I did it for five weeks once.) But I had to. I truly believed that my house would sell before the training began so I could stay with my parents and not be alone. It didn't happen that way. I understand why now. I needed to realize how much I am able to do, and that I am doing a good job.
I have learned to not yell at my children, what a great blessing that is for my children, but especially me. The tone has changed. I am already seeing the blessings in my life.
I have found more fun things to do with my children to keep them happy and entertained. I have been challenged and I feel I have risen to the occasion. I do not always feel like I succeed, but I am this time. I feel good about that!
I miss Randy, oh how I miss him. I feel I value him even more now. He is the best man in the world. He is my Knight in Shining Armor, my Prince Charming. I miss just being near him, and I cannot wait to see him soon. I am incomplete without him. I feel it is good to realize just how much you need and love your other half.
I have started back at the gym, it is so good for me. It gives me a chance to just be. To focus on myself and I just feel all around better. The kids enjoy the break, and the chance to play with some other kids.
Through it all I have felt my Heavenly Father's loving hand. I have felt His Spirit when I have most needed it. I have felt His guidance, and He has brought me peace and given me the strength to do it when I had so many things going wrong when Randy left. He has blessed me so very much and I am so grateful. I know that He is in control and that all the details will fall into place as we relent control and give it to Him. Let Him lead us, go willingly and blindly He will teach us so very much. How grateful I am for a loving Father who is aware of my needs, even better than I am, what a terrific blessing.
Another week down, next week is the last full week. I can do it, I believe in myself, but most importantly my Father believes in me.

Yeller Update!

I am proud to say that for over a week now, since March 1st, I have no yelled at my children. What a blessing it has been to me, and to my children. I have seen a great difference in their behavior, and my days seem a little easier. Each day the desire to yell goes away a little more. I am so grateful for the Ensign Article that really inspired me. I feel I am a better parent because of it. I like me better.
I am patting myself on the back and saying good job. I am doing it!

The Good Ow!

My abs hurt, my legs are sore, my butt hurts too! Tomorrow my arms, and chest will be feeling this way too. It is the best pain in the world. I love it, it makes me feel like I did something grand. I made it to the gym today for the first time since I went on hiatus in December. I didn't want to take the break, I had been going consistently for six months when I stopped. My Lupus went out of control and I didn't have the energy to drag my butt there. Ironic because working out is supposed to help with the fatigue, but I had too many other issues besides that. So slowly with all my meds I am finally feeling like I can jump back into my old routine.
I worked my butt off today, I spent a good chunk of time doing cardio, and then on to weights, my absolute favorite part of working out. I love lifting, and the more I can lift, the happier I am. I do the cardio because it is good for me, but honestly I find it to be pure torture. I wouldn't mind if I was running up and down the Basketball court, but just to run, or do the elliptical for fun? Yeah I would rather pull each leg hair out one by one, that would be more fun for me. But I like the health benefits, you know the healthy heart thing.
I didn't realize how much I had missed it. It is me time. I can go and just think. I can clear my mind. I have a few minutes of the day where I am not being touched, not being needed, just focusing on myself. I love the results also. I am so much more confident in me when I am working out. I swear I see *instant* results, like my butt looks a little tighter. The stretch marks are disappearing from all my ab workouts.. (okay not really, but I can hope right?) I feel like I am so much happier when I am active and working my butt off. I love to sit down and night and hurt. It means I really challenged my body, and that I am doing something to make it stronger.
I am setting a goal of going a minimum of four days a week, but I hope to go more. I know that four is attainable. I went six days a week all last summer until my little man went to preschool, but that gets a bit obsessive for me. I need balance. Hopefully once the weather is warm I will take the dogs on walks/jogs for my cardio, much better than being stuck inside going nowhere. The good ow, it motivates me, helps me to get my butt in gear.. And summer is coming, I want to look good in my swimsuit!!

My commitment

Wednesday, March 1st, 2006 I made a commitment to myself and to my family I was not going to yell at my children anymore. Quite a big commitment huh? I read a great article and decided I was stopping it here and now. Now I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea, I wasn't being verbally abusive. But I did yell, and I always felt like crap after I did. So I decided I am done. No more yelling Knock it off, get to your room, or anything. So I figure if I put my commitment out there, I am really going to have to stick to it right??
I am proud to announce that I have not yelled at my kids since then. I have wanted to, and it has been very hard not to, but I haven't. I have been giving myself a ton of pats on the back, and just keep thinking I can do this, and I will do this. I don't want my kids growing up remembering Mommy yelling all the time.
I was proud of myself son even gave my little girl a bloody nose, she punched him first in the eye, and I didn't yell. We were driving to Grandma's house, so we did timeout once we got there. I think they have been testing me a ton, but I am doing it. I explained to my son that I wasn't going to yell anymore, and he was like ohh Mommy that is good, did you know that yelling is a SIN? And a Sin comes from Satan, he is the DEVIL! He is quite proud of me and keeps encouraging me. He is 4, and he is a terrific motivator. I can tell a difference in me, and I am liking it.
They say it takes 21 days to make a habit and just 3 days to break it. I am going to do this. I am 5 days in, I am doing well. I know I have been a little short at times, but that is way better than yelling. Anyone else want to join me?
Anyone have tips on what they do instead of yelling?

Sleeping Angels

I have Sleeping Angels at my house. They are curled up sleeping and sweet as can be. My daughter loves to go to bed. At night she brings me her blankie and says Mama, Nigh Nigh. And off to bed we go, we say prayer I tuck her in and she is out like that. I love putting her to bed, it is a sweet time. My son will go to bed, not quite as willingly, but after prayer he tends to sit there and smile and giggle, and go to sleep. It is a sweet moment.... most of the time.
I absolutely love to go in and watch them sleep. I love to hear the sweet little noises they make from yelling, screaming, (it totally cracks me up) to the snores, and the little grunts and groans. They are sweet precious sounds. All though my son has informed me that when we move he wants his room far far away from his sister because she snores so loud. I personally have never witnessed this, but whatever.
At the end of a rough day I can go in and watch them sleep and the day is quickly forgotten, and the love I have for my children comes pouring in, making me wonder how I ever lived without them. It makes tomorrow seem conquerable, and like I can accomplish anything.
I am grateful that they sleep the 12-13 hours every night, it gives me a chance to rest, but it also gives them that much more energy. They wake up with more zest for life each day. Maybe if I did what they did, I would too.
Well I am off to check on my Sleeping Angels, to kiss their heads and cover them up and enjoy the sweet moment.

Wahhhhhhh

I became a Mom a little over four years ago, I never cried before I became a Mom. But since I have been a Mom, I swear the water works won't stop. I really don't like to cry. My face gets all blotchy and it looks like I have hives. So I always get a little embarrassed. Here are some examples of stuff I cry easily over.
Two weeks ago my Dad found out that their dog Oreo, who we got when I was a sophomore in HS, that ran away almost two years ago is alive. They found him, he is out in the country and they are leaving him, but to know he is alive, I couldn't stop crying. I was so happy he was okay. Before motherhood I would have never cried at that.
I hear good news, and the tears are rolling.
I go to Church and someone is giving a talk and they start to tear up, and even if I am not really feeling it, I cry. I have sympathy crying, I swear I can't see anyone cry and not cry myself.
Something about being a Mom made my tear ducts hyper active. I cry if I am happy, sad, mad, confused, heck I cry for everything anymore. What did my kids do to me?